Have you ever sat around having fantasies or daydreams about how wonderful life would be if only you weighed less, exercised more, made more money, had a better job, had the perfect partner, or anything else?
On the flipside maybe you have nightmare style stories about how bad everything is. You don’t make enough money, your work is a black-hole of suck or you’re generally just not happy.
The thing about these stories, is they wield most of their power when we become entangled in them – when we become the story.
But what happens to the stories if we can create a little distance between the story and us? Maybe we can gain some more perspective and recognise that our stories are a bit biased. They often contain unhelpful thinking styles such as all or nothing, or dismissing the positive.
So how can we put some space between the stories and ourselves? By not taking them so personally.
Recognise they are just stories, nothing more. Your mind writes the story and you are the reader. Just observe the story as if it was a story-book.
While there are some great fictional story books out there and it’s easy to get immersed in them, at the end of the day we always know it’s just a story. A fictional creation of one or more fellow human minds.
That’s all our own stories are too. Fictional creations from our own minds, often influenced by skewed perspective, or a desire for reality to be different than it is.
This is where guided meditation, such as that provided by the Headspace app can help us with the tools required for observing with a little space.
With a little bit of practice over time, we can learn to not take the stories so personally.